Hideaway

well, its been a long time since i've posted. i kept waiting for time to write that perfect post. one that would describe everything that i've been doing . . . but, reality has struck, and that time will never materialize. which is sad.

so, due to my procrastination, i feel like i've missed lots of opportunities to share fun stuff. oh well, time to move on. i dont want to miss any more opportunities, so i will begin again to share "fun" stuff starting now, with a little video i made for a contest. hope you like it, hope it wins :) .

Hideaway, song by The Weepies.

Dear The Internet,

i'm sorry i've been neglecting you. its just that, i've had a lot to do. i wish i could tell you all about it right now, but, i'll have to give you the full story later. for now, a snapshot.

Blue Delorean

i've been updating my website.

its been a little slow, and there's not much to look at, yet, but its on its way . . .

I Hate Sending Flowers

well . . . maybe thats a bit of an erroneous statement. well . . . maybe not.

i like GIVING flowers. i just dont like SENDING flowers? "But, Mike," you may be inclined to wonder, "what does that mean?"

well, i have tried to send flowers to my lovely financee several times. and, she always loves them. and i feel great! i'm so glad i could brighten her day just a little but blowing some cash on something useless. after all, that is sort of like art, right? at least, according to Victorian philosophers and art critics everywhere (art being a useless item meant to look pretty. . . art for art's sake.)

i am always glad to find out that the flowers actually arrived at the time and place designated. and went to the right person. and brightened her day. and i'm glad i did something "right" (because, lets face it, i'm a a guy, and we gotta do what we can :) ). and i sit back and bask in my own awesomeness, feeling proud, and maybe a little cocky, and then she sends me the picture of the lovely blossoms.

and then i deflate.

why, you ask? i mean, it sounds like everything was nearly perfect, right? well. nearly. except that almost every time i send flowers from an online retailer, they are wrong. sure, Britney is appreciative, and i'm sure she feels all the feelings i would have hoped she would feel from the thought of me sending flowers. but SHE ALWAYS GETS THE WRONG ONES!

but, at least she got flowers, right? i mean, its the thought that counts, right? well . . . . almost.

you see, how can i be sure that she felt as loved as she could have, if she didnt get the flowers i intended. take, for example, exhibit A (or "why i hate FTD"):
notice the little roses in the top right corner. britney got those from me one day, back in , i dont know, septemeber or something. and, you're thinking, whats wrong with those, they seem nice. and sure they are, but notice the big flower dead center in the picture. yeah, thats what she was supposed to have gotten.

whats the problem, right? oh, well, 2 things. for one, the big flowers are Hydrangeas. not roses at all. they delivered flowers that were not even remotely similar. the second problem HYDRANGEAS ARE HER FAVORITE!

so, am i to assume that, though having received some admittedly nice flowers, her emotional response would have been the same as if they had been her actual favorite flowers? and, am i to just be ok with the fact that she got some flowers, even if they weren't the ones i paid for?

way to go FTD. it wasn't even a holiday. how could you screw that up?

they screwed up another order too, but i cant remember what that was. oh, yes i do. at Halloween they had a special orange rose bouquet. so, i thought, i love Britney, and Orange is her favorite color, i'll send her that, since we live far apart, and it would be fun. well, she didnt get Orange roses. she got some crappy little red ones that were already browning when she got them.

nice.

yeah, i called them. they gave me, like, a 5% refund. now THAT's customer service. they said it had something to do with their right to substitute an equivalent flower, based on availability or something. well, thats bullshit. if you're advertising a special arrangement, and someone orders that specific one. . . .maybe there's a reason for that. maybe. . .

consider, for example, exhibit B:

these are the flowers that Britney got for valentines.
they're lovely, right? sure. but does that arrangement look like this one?
admittedly, i was a little late this year with my flower ordering. i ordered on wed. (the 13th) for a thursday (the 14th) delivery. however, i found this bouquet on a website, and wanted to send it, it was perfect, i thought. exactly what i was hoping to "say". sadly, the site said it would not be available for a next day delivery. so, i figured that would be the same for all of their flowers, so i navigated to a different site and, to my excitement, found the same bouquet, which COULD be delivered next day!

i ordered a very specific bouquet, with the very specific promise that it could be delivered as i ordered it.

well, i think you get my point by now. . .

i think that flower delivery places take advantage of distance separation to screw people. i dont know the monetary value of the bouquet recieved. i mean, it could have been worth more than the one i ordered, so they felt justified in sending it instead of my intended selection. i probably would never have known, if digital media hadn't made it so easy to share images. but, i didnt want a more expensive bouquet. i wanted the one i ordered.

flowers, to me, have a specific language about them. maybe that is something that has been brainwashed into us by flower companies, but i dont think so. historically, flowers have always had meaning (or here) Red roses for love and passion, pink or yellow Roses for friendship (i guess depending on the time period), Edelweis denoted a real warrior, etc.

these days, flowers have different or no specific meaning at all (is that a societal commentary in and of itself), except for what you give them. if i wanted her to think i didnt know her so well, i'd send her a bouquet of purple flowers (not her favorite color). if i wanted her to think i was cheap and still in middle school, i'd send her a couple of lame carnations. so, for me, when i want to send the girl i love the flowers that she loves the best, by either type or color, i have a reason. and the places that have been claiming to help me in that regard have nearly always let me down. in exchange for ludicrous sums of money.

except for one place in Lindon, UT, that i couldn't locate, and who's URL i thought i had saved. they got it right. and same day delivery to boot. i wish i could plug them. (that would also be a good illustration or, or parallel to my feelings about chain vs. local restaurants. . . interesting. . .)

well, luckily, Britney and i will be in the same place forever soon enough, and i can just BRING her the flowers i intend for her to recieve. then she'll know exactly what i'm trying to "say". maybe :)

but dont give your money to FTD or Orem Floral (i even tried to call Orem Floral on the number they included in my confirmation email, but all i got was fax machine noise. nice one guys.)

23 or 28 . . . it depends on the circumstances

23

that is. . . assuming that i am of average build, average reach and a little above average height, and that these are just all regular 5 year olds that haven't had their naps or something.

after discussing it with kyle, and considering the question with certain caveats, such as:

are they zombie kids?
are they all severly ADD?
have they all peed themselves withing the last 5 minutes?
do they want to kill me?

and kyle pointing out that you have to assume all of the above, and that "you have to fight there mothers next," i retook the test and found out that i could take 28.

i feel pretty good about that. i would like to thank my one time Taekwondo teacher for helping me up my chances by teaching me the effect of the round house kick.

Thanks Johnny O.

Where Do I Start?

its the new year, where do i start? i mean, after such an eventful holiday time, it seems almost anticlimactic writing on the internet. . .

and WHY was it eventful, you ask?

well, i went to 3 different states, visited the capitol of the free world, celebrated the birth of Jesus spiritually and secularly . . . oh yeah, and GOT ENGAGED! yeah, thats right. dope.

well, the reality of it is that, if you're reading this, you probably already knew that that had happened, but, as articulated by Kristen in email, and by everyone else:

1. How did you propose? (and am i ever going to see pictures?)

2. What does the ring look like?

3. Are you actually going to manage to get the SLC temple reserved in two months? Isn't it kinda crazy?

4. What is it, exactly, that Britnee does?

5. Are you going to blog this?!

so, i answer your questions:

1.) it has been a family tradition to have family and some family friends over to the house on Christmas Eve for dinner and a little program. at some point, we all started receiving pj's on Christmas Eve, in what was, i'm sure, and attempt by my mother to have us all look presentable in the inevitable Christmas morning photos.

at some point, in the last couple of years, the parents have stopped getting us the pj's, because jolly old Saint Nick has been showing up at the house to distribute them to the kids.

well, this year, Santa had a special final gift for one young lady. he proposed for me (since i was scared), and brought me the good news - SHE SAID YES! which was kind of amazing, since she was asked by a fat guy with a beard in front of a bunch of people - and you know how much she likes to be the center of attention. oh, you dont? well, lets just say about as much as having honey poured over her body and being lowered into a hive of red ants.
2.) the ring is/will be a non standard type of setup, consisting of 4 bands - three thin and one fat. two of the thin bands will be yellow gold, one rose gold, with various diamonds set flush. the fourth band will be fat and white gold. all gold will be brushed.

one of the gold bands is the band that i used for her place holder/initial engagement ring. it looks hand made (and is, i guess), and has 3 organically spaced small diamonds.

since its so custom, it has to get made, so i dont have pics of it yet, cause, you know, its getting made.

3.) yes. in fact, its already done, for one of our prospective dates. when we have the real date, you'll know.

4.) Britney (watch that spelling :) ) is currently an account manager for Logoworks, where she interfaces with clients. she is excited to quit this job.

5.) yes.

so, there you have it. complete with pictures of me in a fat man suit.

Britney came to VA for Christmas, then we went together to AZ to hang out with her family for a couple of days. Then to UT for a couple of days cause Britney had to work but i didnt.

speaking of work, i am no longer working at Digital Domain, but have been given a staff position at Asylum, which is the best place i have ever worked. ever. they gave me a beanie today. just cause they're like that.

i started there yesterday. guess what my first task is, post Speed Racer. . . . cant guess? ok, i'll tell you, its prevising a car commercial! good thing i've had months of training :).

Its That Time of Year Again . . .

Its the time of year where various people gather at Sarah's mother's house in an attempt to create the ultimate gingerbread construction. the hours are long, the constructions difficult, and the voting harsh. this is a contest after all. what better way to entice people to push themselves to their creative construction limits than with the promise of voting by their peers with prizes to be awarded for First and Second place house (or, Best House and First Loser).

the trash talking was thick this year, as various teams, remembering their defeats of the past were rallying themselves for the ultimate battle. Chris and I had won the contest twice before with our superior constructions, but we had been defeated last year, as skewed and questionable voting rewarded simple cuteness over technical supremacy and conceptual awesomeness.
i was looking forward to this year. Chris and I were destined to regain the title - we are a superior team of creativeness and construction knowledge, after all. but Sarah and Amy had pulled off a coup last year, and Sarah was counting on Britney, her partner this year, to help her do it again.
Megan Showed up with Joseph, a first time team with a self proclaimed killer idea up their sleeves. And Dan and Ashley, a wild card team, having just returned to the bluster of UT from the fun and sun of Florida were any ones guess.
Jacob was meant to team with Sharon, but ended up flying solo, as she wandered throughout the house supervising the replacement of light bulbs and talking on the phone under the auspice of providing snacks. He was able to recruit the occasional help of Lauren and Ian, who sadly dropped out of the race due to a broken nose. (no, the nose was previously broken, but the pain relieving drugs were heavy). This turned out to be to Jacob's favor, as he constructed his most well designed, well made and complete house to date.
We started around noon, making the plans, baking, building, embellishing. Tensions were occasionally high, as people tried to scope out the plans of other teams, or steal their dough or building supplies. But by 6pm all of the houses were completed and the teams cast their votes.

The voting rules seemed fair enough: vote for the best house. You cant vote for your own.

and here is the field, team members followed by entry:

1.) sarah and britney
2.) mike and chris
3.) dan and ashley4.) megan and joseph
5.) jacob

well, how did you vote, dear reader?

and the winner was . . . team Sarah and Britney, with their Whoville inspired creation.

second place went to . . . Jacob's log cabin.

and we (mike and chris) came in third . . .

Chris and i felt confident that our house stood superior (our windmill vanes actually spun for crying out loud!), but the voting told us otherwise. now, not to discredit the creativity of the Who-house. it was excellent. a fantastic idea, and well executed. everyone did a fantastic job on their houses, in their own right. but still we placed 3rd. that's right, second loser. Once again, the spurious voting of the "judges" proved that our skills were far inferior to those of, say, the creator of the log cabin.

i couldn't help think of the sentiments echoed to me by others about the state of our nations voting lately, where those voting feel more inclined to vote against someone than for the "best" choice. indeed, after our loss, we received many consolations. "it's OK, you know your house is the best", "i couldn't vote for you, because your house was too awesome", "i felt bad for *name omitted* because i thought they wouldn't receive any votes . . .*

well, if they didn't receive the votes, you can tell the loser that they won all you want, but they still don't walk home with the prize.

i fear that this is the obvious result of the over liberalization of our public schools by those who want everyone to feel better except those who truly excel. like, letting kids spell things phonetically in elementary school, so that they don't have to feel bad that they can't live up to the exacting standards so harshly imposed upon them by the constructs of their native language. or letting everyone win, so that no one feels like a loser.

well, i'll tell you who loses in that case - the American people, that's who. if we crush the spirits of those who excel, but punishing them for their brilliance, we will eventually wallow in an eventual state of idiocy. Much like Southern California, or the film Idiocracy.

till next year. . .

Think You Know the World?

this little game kept me occupied for longer than i'd like to admit. but i think i did pretty good, considering.

"Here he comes . . . "

GO!

there has been a lot of buzz in the last couple of days about Speed Racer. i guess the Warner Bro's marketing machine is gearing up for the big race!

The trailer is out with Golden Compass now, and i assume will be online soon.

for the interested, here are links to the various articles of the day.

AICN
USA Today
FirstShowing.net
*Gizmodo

Speed Racer - the official website. not much to it, yet.

more to come, i'm sure. but also, this photo of the Mach 5 is actually a digital rendering done at DD. nobody seems to know that. funny, huh.
i got these photos from the interweb, where they are now ubiquitous.

Seriously?

i suddenly and strangely feel the need to dance.

Space is Cool

ok, who wanted to go to space camp? c'mon, dont be shy.
well, i did, so i love seeing sweet images of space. like this one: from the personal website of some guy named "Texasjim." and, yes, according to his bio, he IS from Texas, believe it or not.

i went to Texas once. it wasn't so bad. in fact, it was kind of nice. and so were all of the people. and they have lax gun laws. that sounds great. but i digress.

Texasjim got these pics from "A friend's granddaughter who works for NASA." (?) well, thats nice Jim. and thanks for sharing.

and thanks NASA . . . . for being awesome.

p.s. i also love sweet movies of space. . . like this one

what kind of gun IS that?

the question was posed relative to the previous post. well, THAT is a Sig p229. a German made .40 caliber pistol with 4" barrel and American made stainless steel slide.

aannnndd. . . it rules. Sig Sauer makes fantastic firearms.

next, i need a 1911 of some sort. old Brother Brownings masterpiece. i also think i'd like eventually collect one from each of the war era's in which its been pivotal.
i also would like to get a .22, for plinking around, and having recently shot a Beretta 9mm, and finding it to be quite enjoyable, maybe i should get one of those too. you know, to round out the collection.

speaking of collections. i guess i should also get a Sig 210. and a Mauser "Red 9." Maybe a Luger. Should i get a M1 Garand?

dont worry, i can own all of those legally in the state of California. despite what the liberal wack jobs would like.

my new toy

well, Peter is all full of himself, now that he started a new blog. great. way to go guy. glad you could make it to the party. but, sorry, we're out of guacamole, and the stripper already went home.

anyways, reading peters self absorbed ramblings, i realized that it has been a while since i posted myself. i did have great, introspective post that i started two weeks ago, complete with relevant cell phone pictures, but now it just seems silly and self aggrandizing to post it. but maybe i will later anyways.

for now, please enjoy this photo of my new toy, taken by my super hot girlfriend. its awesome. i love shooting guns. and britney even pretends to have a good time when i make her come with me.

DHL

i'm trying it. maybe it will work better than UPS has, lately. anybody?

camera 2.0

my monitor finally arrived! HOORAY! its an 8" HD monitor from Ikan. hopefully, today the final pieces of my little rig will show up, then i'll really be in business.

guns and pumkins

had a great weekend . . . more evidence here and here.

I Was an Art Major . . .

BECAUSE: i like art more that science, and this might as well have been in Greek . . . it makes no sense to me. And its not just because of the narrators science-y sounding accent.


apparently, Discover Magazine had an online video contest to see who could best explain String Theory in 2 minutes. and that was the winner.

well, i liked the ducky, anyways.

for Eastern European sounding accents, however, i prefer the more political science explanation of the end of the world seen here:



". . . here is ze Earth . . . chilling. Damn! That is a sweet Earth, you might say. . . "

Ah, online merchants, i love thee, i hate thee

soo, i'm sure we have all experienced the joy and wonderment which is online shopping. i know Andy has. he used to buy so many things online, that if a box showed up at the house, he would just open it, assuming it was his. he was often confused, not remembering having ordered The Art of Incredibles or Disney Treasures DVD's . . . (i dont know WHO ordered those. probably an artist . . .)

its just like Christmas, or your birthday, when the box shows up. being that, by time it arrives, you have been either eagerly anticipating its imminence, or you had forgotten that you ordered it in the first place (unless your roomate opens it first, in which case, its like getting a pair of hand me down socks. . ..) you rush to open it, wondering if this particular cardboard treasure chest contains that camera gear you've been lusting after, or that guide to little known hot spots around town, which will undoubtedly make you the coolest guy in your particular circle, famous in your own lunch line for your knowledge of the underground (i suppose, that is, until you realize that by time the guide was written, published and ordered on Amazon, the particularly unknown nature of that "hot spot" is not so clandestine after all . . . )

however, i'm sure that we, at least a few of us, have also experienced the furor generated by inept sales departments, broken promises and slow shipping.

both of these experiences have been my lot, of late. and i cant help but analyze my dependence on online shopping. is it really worth the wait time for shipping, the hassle of researching and ordering, entering your personal information time and again, hoping that the site is actually secure enough to protect your precious financial information from the prying eyes of the internet savvy, and the extra chore of returning an incorrect or unwanted item. is it really worth the cost savings?

i suppose i have to say yes/no. or . . no/yes. for example, i was recently in the market for a tripod. but all of the information i could find was subjective, and i couldnt find pictures of products big enough to make me even want to spend the small money on their lower internet prices. i lucked out and stumbled on a sale at one of my local emporiums of camera merchandise, and got a great deal. but that deal was definitely enhanced by my ability to be able to touch and use the item. so, in that case, the internet purchasing option was not optimal.

of course, many of my recently ordered items could not even have been purchased at a local shop, and are only available through an online resource, as it has allowed me to purchase from far off states like Texas and Georgia. and there is a big YES for the convenience of being able to buy at and have my items shipped to work, where i basically live, depending on the project.

i find that i would often prefer to buy my items at a local retailer, if only for the convenience of possible return and instant gratification, but i suppose, and fear, that in the end, internet commerce will continue to thrive, and local shops will continue to struggle to match the needs and demands of inventory and customer consumption. i know i am a prime example of going to a shop to research an item in person, then buying it online, for a cheaper price.

but there must be a way for local retailers to compete. perhaps with the model of Circuit City, where you can shop online, and then have the option to pick up your item in a local store, or have it shipped. this is great, because once i am in the store, i am obviously more likely to buy something that i had forgotten i needed, or at least on impulse. perhaps local stores will become small store fronts, where you can see an item in real life, and then order it on the internet, either there, or from home, thus allowing them to keep their inventory and, therefore cost, to a minimum.

it will be interesting to continue to observe the future of commerce in our digital age. what do i think? i dont know, i'm not a business man, i'm just an artist.

New Toys

so. . . i've been in the market lately for a camera. you know, for the production on independent video content. so, after a mind numbing amount of internet research, here's the beginnings of my rig.

i have decided to go with a Canon HV20 camera, with a Red Rock M2 cinema lens adapter. "but, mike," you may be inclined to ask, "why did you decide to go with THAT camera? cant you pick that up in the kiddie aisle at Toys R Us?"

"heh heh, funny you should ask. . . " would be the beginnings of my response to you, while shaking my head. . .

well, suffice it to say that, despite its limited manual control, it was its price tag that was the deciding factor. a camera that can shoot 24p, HDV for under $1000?! and, being that i could get this cam, and spend the bulk of my funds on a lens adapter kid, and still come in under the cost of a Panasonic HVX200, this seemed like the ultimate way to share ideas. and i can always get an HVX later. . . if i need it.

so, i'll be posting test footage, methodology, and anything else that comes to mind about my little cam, as we get to know each other. i still need to get a real tripod, a follow focus, and i need my monitor to come, and a few more peripherals, and i'll really be in business, but this is a pretty good start. . .

now i just have to figure out how to capture the test footage. . . :)